Unleash Your Power: A Guide to Overcoming Comparison on Social Media
In the age of social media, where picture-perfect lives are just a scroll away, it's easy to fall into the trap of comparison. As women navigating the digital landscape, we often find ourselves measuring our worth against curated feeds and filtered snapshots. But guess what? It's time to break free from the comparison game and unleash the power within you!
Welcome to the empowering journey of self-discovery and confidence-building. In this blog series, we're diving deep into the realm of self-love and shedding the shackles of comparison. Let's embark on a transformative ride together and learn
A whopping 86% of Millennials and Gen Z report that they would post sponsored content online for money.
An influencer's story:
"Victoria Paris, 23, an influencer and TikTok It Girl with a total follower count approaching 2 million, was known for her “fit pics” with classic New York City backdrops, like colorfully graffitied storefront shutters, food trucks, fire escapes flanked by skyscrapers, bodega aisles lined with rainbow potato chip bags, and her eclectic Manhattan loft, where even her radiator was adorned with Instagram-friendly plant life.
For Paris, the benefits she gained from documenting her lifestyle online (from her signature #HotGirlsSweat workout routine to cosmetic procedures like lip tattooing and liposuction on her chin) came with serious consequences too. During her rise to New-York fame, she faced repeated personal space violations and stalking, leading to intense anxiety and paranoia. The dreamy life she shared (and sold) wasn’t as idyllic as it seemed.
“I would hear somebody scream my name multiple times at the top of their lungs, and then they’d run across traffic and physically grab me,” she says. Now, “I hear somebody say my name and I flinch.” One of Paris’s worst encounters was when a group of girls stood outside her apartment building, blocking the entrance and screaming her name as she tried to pass by. She realized—for the sake of her mental health and creative spirit—that she couldn’t stay in the city and moved to a less populated area of Los Angeles County.
“I just want privacy for the first time in years,” Paris says. “I have really bad paranoia, which I have struggled with my whole life, that has exploded under influencing. My brain just doesn’t operate anymore. It operates with the fear of the future.” She hopes proximity to nature and a more relaxed California lifestyle will help her heal.
Still, a cross-country move won’t protect Paris from nasty comments on her posts, Reddit threads dedicated to picking her apart, trauma-dumping from followers in her DMs, and the potential for privacy issues in the future. “The Internet is so emotionally volatile that,” after being dragged through the extreme highs and lows on a daily basis, “I wake up feeling zero,” she says.
And while Paris is certainly a well-known presence on social media, she isn’t alone in feeling anxious, unsafe, or even ambivalent about her influence—which is what leads some to leave the online-content-creation space altogether, even if temporarily."
Take Christian Vierling, 25, who knew he had to go offline when he couldn’t make a TikTok without drinking first. Alcohol problems were a part of my brand for a long time,” Vierling says. The fact that unhealthy behaviors can boost metrics is a common issue when it comes to influencing.
Or Tefi who has amassed over 1 million followers on her many accounts thanks to her pop-culture hot takes. But even as someone in the business of sharing her opinion online, Tefi reached the point where she’d just about had enough—the social media feedback loop was making her depression much worse
Or Mikayla Nogueira, 24, who hadn’t taken more than five days off in over two years until the end of September, when she uploaded a video to TikTok about stepping away for her mental health, and only returned to the platform after two months without posting.
Experts agree that influencing can be psychologically addictive. “From a neurological standpoint, you’re constantly getting these intermittent hits of dopamine,” says Jaime Zuckerman, PhD, a clinical psychologist.
Part 1: Recognizing the Comparison Trap: Before we conquer any challenge, we must first understand it. Explore the subtle ways comparison creeps into our lives, affecting our mental health and self-perception. Through relatable anecdotes and real-life examples, we'll identify the signs and acknowledge the impact.
The Illusion of Perfection: Social media often presents a skewed version of reality. Those picture-perfect moments we see are carefully selected highlights, not the full story. It's essential to recognize that what we witness on our screens is a curated glimpse into someone else's life, not the unfiltered, messy reality that we all experience.
Impact on Mental Health: Constant exposure to idealized images can lead to a detrimental impact on our mental health. From fostering feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth to fueling anxiety and depression, the comparison trap can take a toll on our overall well-being. Recognizing these negative emotions is the first step toward breaking free.
The Social Media Highlight Reel: Understanding that what we see on social media is often a highlight reel helps put things into perspective. People tend to share their best moments, achievements, and successes, creating an illusion of unattainable perfection. Realizing this can shift our mindset from comparison to appreciation.
Your Unique Journey: Each person's life journey is unique, shaped by individual experiences, challenges, and triumphs. Embracing your distinct path and understanding that your worth is not determined by someone else's accomplishments is a powerful realization. Your journey is valid, and you are on a path uniquely tailored for you.
Action Steps:
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Self-Reflection: Take a moment to reflect on instances where you've felt the sting of comparison. Understanding these triggers is the first step toward overcoming them.
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Mindful Awareness: Develop a mindful awareness of your emotions while scrolling through social media. Recognize when feelings of comparison arise and consciously shift your focus.
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Reality Check: Remind yourself that social media provides a curated perspective, not the full picture. Challenge the notion of perfection and embrace the authenticity of your own journey.
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Take Social Media Breaks: Schedule them and take them as often as needed
- Set Your Limits: You know that time spent on social media can impact your mental well-being. So set a timer on your phone for the number of minutes (or, if you must, hours) per day that you can spend on social media—and stick to it, Zuckerman says. Employ an accountability partner to help you. Invest your time in other boredom-fighting activities such as reading, painting, working out, exploring nature
- Remember that everything is an advertisement
- Consume Mindful and Positive Content and Unfollow Accounts That Steal Your Joy
- Building a Supportive Community: Connect with like-minded individuals who are on a similar journey of self-discovery. Explore the importance of building a supportive community both online and offline. Engage in conversations, share your experiences, and celebrate each other's victories.